Monday, December 8, 2008

things to tell my teenager

Okay, here's the thing. It is really strange having a teenager when I often feel like one myself. I still remember exactly how I felt when I was 14. In some basic ways I haven't changed at all. Now, here's the other thing. My kid is so much like me and nothing like me at the same time. How to give her advice for navigating the world right now?

First: Take chances. Don't be stupid about taking risks that can damage you but don't be afraid to try new things, go new places, talk to new people.

2nd: Try to stay true to who you really are. Don't let other people try to tell you who they think you should be. This is hard. Really hard. But so worth it. Sometimes you'll forget, but don't worry. Just try again tomorrow.

3rd: One thing I've always tried to do with you is this: When I make a mistake and realize it, I own up to it and apologize. We are human. We are not perfect. That's okay. But if you hurt someone, say you're sorry and really mean it. Then start over. The other side to this is forgiveness. Let go of being angry at someone if you can. It's really poison to you and not productive at all.

4th: Number 3 doesn't mean that you should let people take advantage of you or that you shouldn't stand up for yourself. Don't ever do something that you aren't comfortable with. Don't ever take abuse (physical or verbal) from anyone. You are strong and you have a really good sense of yourself. Believe in that and don't let anyone diminish it. I also know that you are really a nice person and you don't want to hurt anyone. Just don't let someone hurt you because you are afraid of hurting them.

I love you and I want the world for you. I am so excited for the way the world is opening for you. Go out into it and have a great time.


leslie said...

so is that a yes to the mohawk?

Kat said...

ummm . . .no (sorry)