Sunday, May 3, 2009

should we stay or should we go

Things seem to be coming together with our liquidation of assets.  Which is exhilarating and frightening at the same time.  Now comes decision time.  What do we want to do with the rest of our lives?  Do we stay here?  Move back home?  Is this home now?  Will I miss it terribly if I leave?  

At this moment I am sitting on our porch and it is a lovely temperature.  A really strong breeze blows in from time to time but it's a warm breeze.  At this moment I can't imagine being anywhere else.  

I'm afraid my parents are not having an easy time embracing the idea that we may vacate Florida.  And it would be very difficult to not have them close by.  But we really need to decide what is best for the three of us in the long run.  And maybe there is no best.  When I used to look back on our decision to move to Florida I always thought it was a mistake.  I spent my first two years feeling homesick and out of place.  Now, I'm not so sure.  It's been really nice for Leslie to grow up so close to my parents.  And Florida has taken me out of my safety zone so I guess that has forced me to grow.  

Still, if I imagine myself as a little old lady, it is never here in Florida.  I'm in Michigan.  In a little house with a garden.  And a porch.  And I'm happy.  

1 comment:

Jen said...

that made me cry......i want to be a little old lady on a porch with a garden. and happy!

i can see where your heart is. can you?